Words do indeed have the power to influence, compel, and cajole our behaviour, it is no secret that In Britain during the last pandemic, a special branch of the army with psychologists was put to work to generate an atmosphere of fear and caution so that the general population would take the Pandemic seriously to both isolate themselves and submit to injections, via adds, video, and internet social media channels.
We also are to a greater or lesser extent aware that propaganda and advertising all work by their repetition of a particular word, phrase or image. We are herd animals and particularly susceptible to groupthink and dynamics. Hence those who wish to be powerful end up buying all the levels of communication in our societies. newspapers, radio, film industries, and now of course social media avenues.
If you doubt how easily we are eager to conform I refer you to this previous article with videos of – the mindless sheeple. Ultimately, the carrot is safety and the stick is fear, to which we are all susceptible.
Depressing as our herd mentality and ignorance of how easily we are manipulated is, I wish to focus on our individual lack of power and how the words that we use define our level of self-awareness and ability to healthily engage with the world around us
Most of us have a continuous dialogue running in our heads, it is a bit like a dam behind which a huge volume of emotional water is held back in our subconscious. These waters represent our suppressed emotional experiences which have been accumulating since we were little children.
Our minds have the job of protecting us from being overwhelmed, and this it does with words to distract and obfuscate, unfortunately, many of these words are negative and designed to subdue us and keep us in check:
I am worthless, I am useless, I can’t do this, I will never be any good, I am ugly, I am a bad mother,
These words have one major function to dissociate us from our emotional centre.
men don’t cry, its not my fault, he/she made me do it, he/she is to blame,
Some emotions are allowed to get through, for the dam needs to release some of the water continuously to maintain a level of sanity “blowing some steam off”. However, these emotions are not fully felt or integrated into the body system. Some emotions of a negative nature are encouraged by our mental beliefs to control our behaviour like self-loathing, and self-anger.
The mind – purveyor of personal enslavement
We have disagreements with others we go away and our minds continue to regurgitate the event with words, I would have said this or that etc., all the while disassociating from the emotions of our being misunderstood, unfairly treated, behaving too meekly, fearful, embarrassment, etc.,
Fear, lack of self-worth, unwillingness to define our boundaries with others, and need to be liked and accepted all conspire to our mind’s determination to deny us internal free expression and impose conformity in us.
All of the above creates rigidity, initially mentally, then emotionally, and finally physically
To be a flexible and creative human being in the full sense of the word. we start by changing our language and the way we speak with ourselves as well as others. Aim to erase all negative phrases from your vocabulary it will take a while but is well worth doing. From now on say to yourself I will only speak positively about myself and others.
But of course, we first of all have to catch ourselves in the act! There are certain words that define our interactions with others I suggest you make it your aim to be aware in your conversations every time you use these words for example:
Aim to always put other people first ie. when speaking say “John, Mary, and I” ..did so and so. rather than “me, John and Mary”… did do and so.
Aim to always speak “with” people rather than “talk to” people ie. “I was speaking with John”, rather than… “I was talking to Mary”. “I wish to speak with you” rather than “I want to talk to you”
Often in conversation people will say “let me tell you this, or “This is what you should do” The recipient will invariably get irritated, – nobody likes to be told anything! If you wish to be heard predate your sentence with “may I share this” or, give an example of your own life experience. “may I make a suggestion?
A favourite these days it would seem when ending a conversation avoid saying ‘I will let you go now‘ why not end with ‘it was lovely speaking with you but I must go‘- just one possible example.
Avoid words like ” oh bless” or “bless you“. way overused in this day and age. and smacks of religious arrogance. or “I will pray for you” assumes you have a special ear to the Almighty denied to your subject, you might need to think about this one.
When it comes to friends avoid saying “he/she is my friend”. How about “I am his/her friend” or “We are friends“
Positive words are powerful when telling ourselves or addressing others
If you say to a youngster don’t go near the edge their mind doesn’t hear the first part, then you are cross when they disregard your demand. More useful would be a positive statement such as “Please come to me, the edge is dangerous”.
In a crowded theatre, someone says “fire!”, and everyone panics and looks for the exit, what do they shout? don’t run! what do you imagine they hear?
I suggest you Remove these words from your vocabulary and avoid telling yourself or others such words as:
don’t do this, I can’t do this,
I am/you are useless,
I/you will never learn,
I/you will fail.
it is impossible
I am/you are not good enough
“If I did this, or that” “I f I had done it this way instead” …….. avoid changing the past? it is a form of self-torturing that achieves little.
Nuclear bombs to avoid when it comes to our psyche:
I hate myself
I dislike myself
I wish I was dead
why does it always happen to me?
I can’t stop myself!
If you truly take on board all of the above as well as those expressed in the podcast below you will inevitably be much more aware of the power of words as they are expressed by you as well as others, your relationship with yourself and others will become more harmonious and in turn -hopefully loving.